The Adventures of Tintin: The Secret of the Unicorn

Name: The Adventures Of Tintin: The Secret Of The Unicorn
Year: 2011
Rating: PG
Running Time (minutes): 107
Description: Having bought a model ship, the Unicorn, for a pound off a market stall, Tintin is initially puzzled that the sinister Mr Sakharine should be so eager to buy it from him, resorting to murder and kidnapping. Tintin – accompanied by his marvellous dog Snowy – joins him and his gang as they sail to Morocco on an old cargo ship. Sakharine has bribed the crew to revolt against the ship’s master, drunken Captain Haddock, but Tintin, Snowy and Haddock escape, arriving in Morocco at the court of a sheikh, who also has a model of the Unicorn. Haddock tells Tintin that over three hundred years earlier his ancestor Sir Francis Haddock was forced to scuttle the original Unicorn when attacked by a piratical forebear of Sakharine, but he managed to save his treasure and provide clues to its location in three separate scrolls, all of which were secreted in models of the Unicorn.
Stars: Jamie Bell, Andy Serkis and Daniel Craig
Genres: Animation, Action, Adventure

I tried to watch this, hoping Tintin wouldn’t be the annoying prat he was in the TV series of yesteryear, but honestly… Wouldn’t you think that a journalist understood that:
1. Dogs cannot understand human language?
2. Dogs can therefore not participate in detective operations?
3. TALKING TO YOURSELF AND THINKING ALOUD IS UTTERLY USELESS? ‘I wonder what this means, why would he say that, I must know what’s going on.’ Well maybe if you shut the hell up for a while and just thought in silence, you might come up with a few answers!


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